"I lived between my heart and my head,
like a married couple who can’t get along."
Edward Hirsch
What an interesting way to start a poem...The poem is titled "Self portrait." When I read that poem the other day, it occurred to me that the war between the head and the heart in my life ended with a decisive victory in favor of the head years ago...and I had hardly noticed. I am unsure, however, if the better side won...My head has had the upper hand for so long that my heart submits with barely a whimper.
Isn't it time for a little rally of the heart, a time to breathe some life back into the mix? Yes. bring it on. Let the internal boat rock a bit... why not, since my heart is where the joy in my life has always called home! It was my heart that came alive in the late 60's and it was my heart that had a spiritual awakening in the early 80's. What happened? How could I have forgotten? What has my head accomplished that could touch either of those events? What has 25 years of school and a 30+ year career, and 20 years of being an in-your-head-evangelical-Christian done to me? I don't place the blame on academia, the church, the APA...I just think I slowly became complacent in surrendering the heart to the head. I'm not talking about having a mid-life crisis, here...I'm beyond mid-life...I'm certainly not talking about turning away from my faith (the problem isn't Jesus, it's my head, and He's been whispering to my heart all along), or quitting my career... I'm talking about giving the heart permission to speak up a bit and airing it's own meaningful and strong point of view in matters. even if it creates a little internal squable Doctor...get out the paddles...get that current flowing. Clear...
Time to mix it up a little, no? No, not like a married couple who can't get along. It's just time to restore the balance of power to a more equitable position. A little road trip from the head on down the highway to the heart... while the heart still beats!
Here's the poet, Edward Hirsch, reading "Self-portrait" and two more of his poems -
When the universe is silent, in the stillness of the night, which voice do you listen to: the head or the heart? Is the head finally quiet, allowing the heart to fly beyond these earthly confines? Truly, it is the heart that gives the soul wings.
ReplyDeleteThank you for these slices of life.